Aug 22, 2010

Saying goodbye is definitely one of the hardest things to do in life.
I've been here for about two weeks
But it felt like two months.

In these two weeks I've said many goodbyes.
And I realize it takes much courage to watch someone walk away.
For some, you watch knowing they are walking right out of your life.
For a few, the very few, you know God has richly blessed you with them.
Still, life is full of surprises.
Some particular individuals
Whom you thought would last a lifetime of friendship with you
Turn out to be disappointments.
But as I mentioned before,
You are only disappointed if you have expectations in the first place.
And expectations often creep in in silence.
They surface when the rest of your heart sinks.

With bad surprises come good surprises.
Sometimes, in your loneliest of times
You find that God has instill hope in your life.
When you are hanging by a thread
You find that at times hope isn't a blasting thunder
Or a roaring storm
But a simple conversation, a simple hello, a simple smile.

Hence, I have personally testified
That people with less are more easily satisfied.
In a land of strangers
I am happy with any familiar faces.
I am content with a small stroll by the sidewalk.
Or a short time making breakfast together.
I'm fulfilled with a short 2 hour dinner
With relatives I have not seen in years.
Or a smile flashing from a stranger.
I'm taken by surprise a message from a friend
Or a morning chat hearing about someone else's life.

When I think about friendship
I can't help but erupt a little with anger.
A hint of rage.
Friends don't use each other, correct?
They don't play with your emotions.
They don't pretend like they care

You have not the guts.
Not the courage.
You have yet to understand.

And as for me, I have yet to meet all kinds of people in this world.
But let me eliminate one off my list -
People who earn your trust and throw it away.
I do trust people too easily.

Daddy, give me discernment.
Give me wisdom.
But most of all - give me a forgiving heart.