Every now and then, you realize you've made a mistake
It's so easy to trust someone
So easy to give your heart away
Even more easier to trust the wrong person.
Forgiving has never been this difficult
Maybe all I need is time
...maybe not.
But I don't believe that this will never heal.
That's because my God is a Healer.
There's no pain He doesn't know of
No scars He hasn't seen
No tears He can't dry
No one, He can't save.
With rain comes a rainbow.
A dead flower sprouts new life
In His wounds, there is healing.
Nov 21, 2009
Nov 1, 2009
Gone Too Soon
I saw a bug on my wall today and so I turned to tell my mom to kill it. The next thing I know, it's not there anymore. It dawned on me that there is not grasping onto time. I watched Michael Jackson's "This Is It" last night and I've developed a new layer of appreciation and admiration for this man. It's funny how people would pay their way to the theatres to watch him...only after he's gone. When he's alive and well, people criticize him, say things about him - all out of spite. I've never seen so much passion, so much talent, so much dedication in anyone. Watching him on the screen puzzled me for a minute, it's almost like he never died. Some people are born for the stage - Michael Jackson is definitely one of them. I honestly don't think he's a bad person. In the things he say, the way he directs his dancers, there's humility. I can't stress on how much I think his family and the media has destorted him. Come to think of it, he's only a few days from his last concert. All the hard work and preparation never did have a chance to shed their lights. I'll never understand why he never got the chance to be on the stage in front of his fans again...and I'll never know where he is right now (someday I will) but I guess the lesson of the day is, appreciate what you have before you. Saying this almost sounds cliche. As cliche as it is, it''s true. Like that bug on my wall, I'll probably never see it again...not that I want to. But there are people who we need to appreciate before it's too late for us to.
And because I'm on this Michael Jackson craze, I've been listening to a lot of his songs. I can't deny how inspirational his songs are. There's real impact, real change he's made. He was born to be on the stage, to make a difference. There's no saying whether he died too soon or not, that's not up to us. But one thing that's up to us, is how we want to live the life we're given.
R.I.P. Michael Jackon.
Oct 7, 2009
Today,
I learned to shut my mouth and walk away
even when I have every reason NOT to.
The tongue is a powerful thing.
Everyday you see people you wish didn't exist (at least in your world)
You hear things you wish you didnt
You know things that should've remained unknown
You ask yourself, why is she like that?
Why is he like that?
Why are things this way?
Let's learn to ask ourselves...
Why am I like this.
A friend used to always say "it's all in your head"
I'm starting to see some truth in that.
If there is a will, there is a way.
I've always been told
The times you least want to pray
Are the times you most need to pray.
I'd like to say
The times you least want to love
Are the times when love is most needed.
Beneath all the superficiality
Behind all the fake smiles and shallow conversations
Underneath every fault you see
There is something beautiful waiting for a grand discovery
I remember discussing my blog name with Terence once
Beauty in ashes.
We are all nothing but ashes
Beauty isn't so easily found
But I'll look and look past the ashes
Until beauty is found
in you.
I learned to shut my mouth and walk away
even when I have every reason NOT to.
The tongue is a powerful thing.
Everyday you see people you wish didn't exist (at least in your world)
You hear things you wish you didnt
You know things that should've remained unknown
You ask yourself, why is she like that?
Why is he like that?
Why are things this way?
Let's learn to ask ourselves...
Why am I like this.
A friend used to always say "it's all in your head"
I'm starting to see some truth in that.
If there is a will, there is a way.
I've always been told
The times you least want to pray
Are the times you most need to pray.
I'd like to say
The times you least want to love
Are the times when love is most needed.
Beneath all the superficiality
Behind all the fake smiles and shallow conversations
Underneath every fault you see
There is something beautiful waiting for a grand discovery
I remember discussing my blog name with Terence once
Beauty in ashes.
We are all nothing but ashes
Beauty isn't so easily found
But I'll look and look past the ashes
Until beauty is found
in you.
Oct 1, 2009
If we always get what you want...
where is the longing?
where is the desire?
the beauty of retraining
lies in the reaping
of waiting...waiting and waiting..
patience produces perseverance
sometimes it's better to just wait
because only years of waiting can make you learn
what it means to appreciate
to adore
to love.
separation brings about suffering
but the agony builds character
if we go around looking to satisfy our desires
it will only be an endless journey
because at the deathbed of one desire
springs forth another
it all comes back to surrendering
waiting
hoping
trusting
...and obeying
"if we hold tightly to anything given to us, unwilling to let it go when the time comes to let it go or unwilling to allow it to be used as the Giver means it to be used, we stunt the growth of the soul." - Elisabeth Elliot
where is the longing?
where is the desire?
the beauty of retraining
lies in the reaping
of waiting...waiting and waiting..
patience produces perseverance
sometimes it's better to just wait
because only years of waiting can make you learn
what it means to appreciate
to adore
to love.
separation brings about suffering
but the agony builds character
if we go around looking to satisfy our desires
it will only be an endless journey
because at the deathbed of one desire
springs forth another
it all comes back to surrendering
waiting
hoping
trusting
...and obeying
"if we hold tightly to anything given to us, unwilling to let it go when the time comes to let it go or unwilling to allow it to be used as the Giver means it to be used, we stunt the growth of the soul." - Elisabeth Elliot
Sep 28, 2009
Under My Umbrella
Rain inspires me to write.
I left school today feeling perplexed. Although the rain wasn't hard, but the walk from school to my bus stop is not so short when raindrops tap endlessly on the head. I ducked from cover to cover until I stopped right in front of Welcome. The option in taking a taxi home isn't so appealing when you can save thirty dollars. So I decided to purchase my first umbrella. I went into Welcome and approached the lady who was ever so helpful in introducing me to all kinds of umbrellas they sell. Half of them have the word Welcome on it. Not very attractive. So I took into my hand, what the lady called a pale yellow child umbrella. Ironically, it was bigger than what I need. The umbrella is also, just right for my height. I walked towards the cashier with a hundred dollar bill. Seeing the line, I had long moments of hesitation. But I guess my phone distracted me long enough. When it was my turn, the lady asked where the price tag was. Funny how the cashier was asking me that. I said I dont know. She said "That's seven ninety".
Wait what?
Seven nineth. $7.90. I paid and left.
For some reason, this umbrella gives me so much satisfaction. It's so true that the weather can affect us a great deal, as Terence said. But I also believe it depends a lot on you. As I began our first journey, I felt genuinely happy. Perhaps because that overcasting cloud over me the past few days is on its way out of my world. I don't know what it is. Sitting in my bus, I stared at that umbrella hanging next to me.
It was just a $7.90 worth of...umbrella. But I felt that it was my prized possession.
I've never owned a personal umbrella. And I realized as I am sitting in front of my computer, typing this, that the first is always the most precious, most memorable. Whatever it is, the first will always be the first. The umbrella now leans by the front door and looking at it gives such a satisfying feeling.
That feeling is so warm and safe. Now I am not a freak.
The umbrella, one way or another, will be in the hands of another person. Or perhaps blown away by a typhoon 8. But...right now it's safe and dry in my apartment. And the first will always be the first. That pale yellow just about describe everything I'm feeling right now. The weather doesn't define your feelings. You define the weather. Sometimes I hate the rain. I hate that wetness you feel in your socks. But today, sitting in my bus, the rain has become my friend.
Maybe because I have a umbrella now :)
I left school today feeling perplexed. Although the rain wasn't hard, but the walk from school to my bus stop is not so short when raindrops tap endlessly on the head. I ducked from cover to cover until I stopped right in front of Welcome. The option in taking a taxi home isn't so appealing when you can save thirty dollars. So I decided to purchase my first umbrella. I went into Welcome and approached the lady who was ever so helpful in introducing me to all kinds of umbrellas they sell. Half of them have the word Welcome on it. Not very attractive. So I took into my hand, what the lady called a pale yellow child umbrella. Ironically, it was bigger than what I need. The umbrella is also, just right for my height. I walked towards the cashier with a hundred dollar bill. Seeing the line, I had long moments of hesitation. But I guess my phone distracted me long enough. When it was my turn, the lady asked where the price tag was. Funny how the cashier was asking me that. I said I dont know. She said "That's seven ninety".
Wait what?
Seven nineth. $7.90. I paid and left.
For some reason, this umbrella gives me so much satisfaction. It's so true that the weather can affect us a great deal, as Terence said. But I also believe it depends a lot on you. As I began our first journey, I felt genuinely happy. Perhaps because that overcasting cloud over me the past few days is on its way out of my world. I don't know what it is. Sitting in my bus, I stared at that umbrella hanging next to me.
It was just a $7.90 worth of...umbrella. But I felt that it was my prized possession.
I've never owned a personal umbrella. And I realized as I am sitting in front of my computer, typing this, that the first is always the most precious, most memorable. Whatever it is, the first will always be the first. The umbrella now leans by the front door and looking at it gives such a satisfying feeling.
That feeling is so warm and safe. Now I am not a freak.
The umbrella, one way or another, will be in the hands of another person. Or perhaps blown away by a typhoon 8. But...right now it's safe and dry in my apartment. And the first will always be the first. That pale yellow just about describe everything I'm feeling right now. The weather doesn't define your feelings. You define the weather. Sometimes I hate the rain. I hate that wetness you feel in your socks. But today, sitting in my bus, the rain has become my friend.
Maybe because I have a umbrella now :)
This is afterall, a very random post.
The sun's in your heart when you don't see it in the sky
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